Dipdyuti's Blog 2017

We were totally unprepared for my mother’s death. It was like a tsunami that hit us during a happy period and the whole family was thrown off course. We are picking up the bits and pieces and we do not know how long it will take for us to be back on track. Sometimes, my mother wanted to discuss her death with me. My common reply was, “I shall not think or discuss on this matter till you cross 80 years of age”. A few months back she was insistent and told me she does have something to discuss on her own death. Initially, I avoided and tried to change the subject but she was adamant. So to humor her I listened to what she said. Her first wish was we should take proper and good care of my father. She would tell me, “Do not think that spending a lot of money you can buy a thing called - care”. Her wish was that we should keep my father happy and functioning. “Never treat him like he is a burden”, was her directive. She secondly told me, “Follow the religious norms as ...

This incident happened when I was 11 years old and we were staying in a small town called Nowgaon. Hearing my mother calling me from the kitchen, I went towards her. I thought that she wanted me to go out and buy some mustard oil or some spices from a nearby shop. Or maybe she is angry with me for not tidying my study desk properly. I found her in the kitchen in the normal place cutting some vegetables in the small table near the window. As I went near her she smiled and told me, “I wanted to show you a cute little bird with vermillion on its forehead”. I waited near her as she continued her work and kept on humming a tune very softly. Suddenly she pointed out. The cute bird with a red colored forehead was feasting on a papaya tree behind our kitchen. Far later, as I took up bird photography I learned it is a “Copper Smith Barbet”. That was my mother. She got a lot of pleasure from nature and tried to share so many things with me. She had a nickname for every bird and na...

When my soul wandered away This is a very serious area which I have decided to write after a lot of thought. The basic purpose is to touch a taboo subject and bring it to the fore, rather than sweep it under the carpet. A healthy human being means one who is physically and mentally sound. As our parents grow old and reach 90 years and above we take a lot of care on the physical aspects of their health. However, we remain unprepared to tackle the mental issues associated with old age. This results in a lot of suffering for our seniors. We ignore mental health aspects as a taboo subject. My father is 95 years old. He lost his constant companion after 54 years of marriage. I am sharing certain experiences so that other people passing through a similar stage can plan and take proper care of their seniors. My father was suffering from forgetfulness. Doctors told us that it is normal at this age and they prescribed vitamins and other dietary supplements. Dementia is not...

Utpala Chowdhury - 30 Nov 1941 – 02 Jan 2018 -  A tribute She was born in the quaint little town of Tezpur on 30 November 1941. Her parents were Late Betharam Deka and Late Indu Prova Deka. By the time the British left India she lost her father who died young. She was taken care of by her eldest brother Late Mrigen Deka (A school teacher) and her mother along with her other siblings. This growing up fatherless in an economically tough environment steeled her character into a strong, fearless and above all very sensible lifestyle. She understood and appreciated the value of life and its simple pleasures. She knew how to create happiness from the most mundane things. She was married to Shri Jatindra Mohan Chowdhury in Feb 1964. My father was from Barpeta. The first child (Myself) was born on Nov 1965 and the second (My brother – Bedadyuti Chowdhury) was born on Nov 1967.  My father had a transferable job and we stayed in various places of the North East like Shillo...